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Current Thinking On Positive Reinforcement Article
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Foundation for a Successful Relationship
from:Just like a good home, a good relationship is built on a solid foundation. That way when one tough wind or serious fight comes along, the relationship, just like the house, isn’t destroyed. Now here are some posts to support that foundation:
1. The Time Post
To develop a good relationship, you need to spend time together, in good times and bad. Regardless of whether or not you have two nickels to rub together, you need to do things together – take walks, team up to start a small business together on a shoestring budget, visit the public library to borrow How to Start Your Own Business books, etc.
2. Take Charge Post
Both people in the relationship need to realize that they are not responsible to be the other person’s sole source of happiness and activity. In other words, each person needs to take charge of his or her own happiness and fill it with things to make life enjoyable with respect to his of her mate.
For example, some people believe that once they get married, extra-curricular activities like men’s night or women’s night with cards is out. And they focus all nights together as a couple. This can be boring for long term! A break away from each other is necessary for mental health and growth – plus new things to talk about. So let the other person miss you a little, and get out and have fun.
Also you don’t want to focus your sole life around your child, either. Because when it’s time to let go, you will have an empty life to look at instead of a more rounded one with friends and activities ongoing throughout your life.
3. Loyal & Trustworthy Post
Both people in a relationship need to seriously be able to count on each other – in good times and in bad. You are each other’s best friend. That means when the family of the bride is complaining about how awful the groom is, the wife sticks up for the groom. And when the groom’s family does similar, he sticks up for his bride. And the entire time they are married, this two-step needs to be in place.
4. Priority Post
As a couple, you both need to place the needs of each other as priorities. In other words, if the husband’s best friend from high school, also his buddy in his card night once a week, has a car problem, his own wife’s needs must come first if presented with a choice. She may need a medicine refill, and the buddy’s flat tire can wait or be repaired at a service center. Let each other know who is important and who has priority.
So strand strong in your relationship. Because although there may be damage, the foundation will ground the relationship so that it remains a solid structure.
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